Sunday Morning Musings

In a perfect world, this would be me this morning. Except she doesn't have coffee and that is simply unacceptable. 

How can one live with five other humans and still feel so alone?

Let’s meander through this thought this morning, shall we? (heavy on the sarcasm)

Within our family we have so many dynamics. A bachelor farmer who was set in his ways. A VERY independent housewife. Kids ages 11-22. It’s like a simmering cauldron ready to implode at any minute. Throw in different schedules, temperaments, tendencies, dispositions and a pinch of chaos and that’s basically our family. 

The struggle is ever so real to wake up each morning and face the day. I’ve always been truthful in my musings and I intend to keep it that way. 

Again, in the midst of all of this, how am I going to stop feeling so very lonely?

Two things: I’m going to find God and then I’m going to find myself.

Why this order you may ask? Because I truly believe that without God, I am nothing. I need His spark and love and boundaries to direct my life. Then the exciting part? I get to fill in the rest with all of the good things He has given me! My talents, worship, amazing friends, and also learning to not feel lonely in the midst of the endless chaos.

I truly believe that the loneliness I am feeling is not unique to my story, and so we will continue to explore this somewhat sensitive topic, dig deep, rip the bandaids off so to speak and expose those wounds. Wounds need exposure to heal. Trust me. They need to be aired and discussed and recognized for what they are. 

And that is why today, my dear friend, I am going to a you-pick flower garden and smell the roses. All of them. After I take my allergy meds.

God’s got us!

Carolyn

P.S. Thee farm boys tried to kill some wasps this morning by throwing gas on them and lighting it with a torch. Help me, Jesus.